The healing power of non-monogamy

In March 2018 I left an abusive marriage and entered into a new phase of life: the casually slutty phase. My dating app profile included the line, “I am dedicating 2018 to non-monogamous exploration.” I had my first one time hookups, met my first friend with benefits, and soon met my first long-term partner after … Continue reading The healing power of non-monogamy

Can emotional abuse be sexual abuse?

I got divorced last May, and in the midst of Justin Timberlake memes and shorts weather and anticipating my upcoming book launch, the anniversary of my divorce date looms near. And I am still mad at my abuser, which is frustrating because I thought I would have overcome all my trauma in a neat, tidy … Continue reading Can emotional abuse be sexual abuse?

The life changing magic of trauma

If you're familiar with Marie Kondo's The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, you know that her method of simplifying requires you to get all of one type of item together (clothing, books, toiletries, papers, whatever), touch each and every one, and decide if it gives you joy before deciding whether or not to keep … Continue reading The life changing magic of trauma

An open letter to my abuser’s ex wife

Hello. I am not sure if you care to hear from me, or indeed if you even know who I am. I'm the woman your husband left you for. And I am deeply sorry, on so many levels. When I met him, he was in an open relationship with permission to play and "get his … Continue reading An open letter to my abuser’s ex wife