What is Your Responsibility?

You can’t expect someone else to do the work that’s in your own mind. Of course, you can get help from a therapist or a friend or a coach to help you process, but doing the work is on you. All the therapy in the world won't help you if you don't actually dig in and get uncomfortable and vulnerable to do the processing. The flip side is that other people’s emotional processing is THEIR job. You can’t do it for them.

Achieving for Love: How Gifted Kid Burnout Manifests in Insecure Adulthood (and How to Fix It)

Being labeled as gifted and talented often leads educators and parents to expect that these children will be good at anything and everything. But giftedness and talent doesn't work like that, and just because these students can do something doesn't mean they should have to master it.

Practicing Boundaries After Trauma

Boundaries take practice, especially when you have a history of trauma. Being a survivor of abuse can make the inner alarm bells malfunction -- they either don't go off at all because mistreatment has been normalized, or they go off at the slightest whiff of something that reminds you of a past traumatic experience. This … Continue reading Practicing Boundaries After Trauma

A breakup doesn’t mean you failed

When you're deeply committed to someone, the end of that relationship can be devastating. Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendship, or even removing a family member from your life -- breaking up is hard. But it doesn't mean you've failed at anything. I reject the notion that a relationship that doesn't last a lifetime is … Continue reading A breakup doesn’t mean you failed

The Holiday Obligation Bill of Rights

It's that time of year again. It's only the first week of December but the flames on your holiday stress fire have been getting hotter since mid November. I'm prone to seasonal affective disorder, which starts as soon as the time change happens and the clocks roll back an hour. Suddenly it's pitch black when … Continue reading The Holiday Obligation Bill of Rights