The 8 Different Types of Love

Whether you are attending a Galentine’s Day brunch, treating yourself to a night of self-care or spending the holiday with a special someone, Valentine’s Day is the perfect occasion for celebrating love. However, as many know, you don’t need romance to commemorate relationships and the love you have for someone. This February 14th, examine how … Continue reading The 8 Different Types of Love

Practicing Boundaries After Trauma

Boundaries take practice, especially when you have a history of trauma. Being a survivor of abuse can make the inner alarm bells malfunction -- they either don't go off at all because mistreatment has been normalized, or they go off at the slightest whiff of something that reminds you of a past traumatic experience. This … Continue reading Practicing Boundaries After Trauma

An Open Letter to the Person Who Isn’t Ready to Leave

Do you suspect that there's something amiss in your relationship? Whether it's with a romantic partner or a friend or a family member, it doesn't matter. But something feels wrong and you think maybe if you had better boundaries or could stand up for yourself this wouldn't be happening. You might be wondering if you … Continue reading An Open Letter to the Person Who Isn’t Ready to Leave

Find your shortcuts to healthier boundaries and love

A couple weeks ago I attended a queer geek convention in Cleveland in its second year - Flaming River Con. On a complete whim, I messaged the admins of the con on Facebook with a week to go before the event and offered to host a workshop on figuring out how to communicate your boundaries … Continue reading Find your shortcuts to healthier boundaries and love

A breakup doesn’t mean you failed

When you're deeply committed to someone, the end of that relationship can be devastating. Whether it's a romantic relationship, friendship, or even removing a family member from your life -- breaking up is hard. But it doesn't mean you've failed at anything. I reject the notion that a relationship that doesn't last a lifetime is … Continue reading A breakup doesn’t mean you failed

There’s no timeline on healing or love

When I turned 25, I made a five year plan. Become debt free and a mother by 30, in April 2018. I am now 31 and neither of those things happened. In fact, as 30 approached, I was facing a lot of other huge life circumstances. In August 2016 I got married and immediately started … Continue reading There’s no timeline on healing or love

How to ask for the love you need

I recently did something that I thought would be silly, or selfish, or outlandish. I wrote a manual on how to love me. It gives the basics about me and my background, includes a list of my favorite things, discusses how to best communicate with me, describes how I interact within each of the five … Continue reading How to ask for the love you need

The healing power of non-monogamy

In March 2018 I left an abusive marriage and entered into a new phase of life: the casually slutty phase. My dating app profile included the line, “I am dedicating 2018 to non-monogamous exploration.” I had my first one time hookups, met my first friend with benefits, and soon met my first long-term partner after … Continue reading The healing power of non-monogamy