Over the past week I've dreamed about my former best friend twice. I almost said ex best friend -- because it feels like an ex situation. Why don't we have more of a cultural narrative around friendships ending? In the first dream, I needed a place to stop for safety. There was a sense of … Continue reading I wish you’d let me say sorry
I cut contact with my mother in January 2017. It was a sudden decision, but it also wasn't. I had spent several months (if not a couple years) beforehand learning about emotional abuse by reading books like Will I Ever Be Good Enough by Karyl McBride, Toxic Parents by Susan Forward, and Codependent No More … Continue reading I Said I’d Never Forgive My Mother… But I Have
I realized last night that I haven't had to defend myself from inappropriate blame for over two and a half years. Coming off a four day vacation during which I actually rested and had fun, it occurred to me that I am really and truly not the person I used to be. Vacation time used … Continue reading 4 Annoying Truths about Breakups
I used to be so fucking judgmental about parenting. I was SURE that I'd be the best parent ever. (Pause for laughter to subside). Now, I'm a lot more knowledgeable, a lot less judgy, and have a LOT more grace for parents doing the hardest work in the world with little to no thanks, and … Continue reading For the parents healing generational wounds
Ever since I was a kid, I have been conflict-avoidant. Conflict didn't feel safe, because my emotions were unwelcome and my boundaries were nonexistent. I never saw my parents modeling conflict in a healthy way, and I learned to keep my mood neutral to positive and to avoid adults when they were angry. This is … Continue reading Conflict is Trust: Positive Conflict Resolution
I have a hard time with boundaries, rejection, and balancing my desire to be liked with my desire to be myself. When I notice that I'm censoring, editing, and polishing a post to perfection — a post for my friends to read, no less — it's a surefire sign that I'm putting too much energy into being … Continue reading What Do We Owe Our Facebook Friends?
This is a love letter to the saviors, the fixers, the let-me-handle-that-ers, the chronic "yes" people... the people pleasers. I bet you're exhausted. I know I was. The other day, a client of mine (also my bestie, so we talk about a lot of things besides work) sent me a screenshot of their calendar showing … Continue reading For the People Pleasers who Compulsively Fix People’s Problems
We all have an inner child, the part of us that is still connected to our childhood, upbringing, and the things we learned in our most formative years. Unfortunately, when we were wounded in childhood, those pains and patterns often come with us and repeat throughout our adult life, affecting relationships, work, and even our … Continue reading Healing Your Inner Child: The Basics
As a creative coach, I of course focus on my clients' creative passions, but we coach on all kinds of topics including relationships, boundaries, and breakups. The simple answer to this question is anything but simple: It's different for every person and every breakup. You might need more time than a person who went through … Continue reading How Fast Should You Move On from a Breakup?
As we go through our lives after a traumatic event, we may feel like we're over it on the surface, but our body remembers the stress and may repeat it. This can be triggered by the time of year, specific smells, triggering circumstances that remind you of the trauma, and more. This post is about … Continue reading 5 Things To Do For Your Traumaversary
Caitlin Liz Fisher 